Since 2004, Portland's Only Bar Trivia That Matters.
Full disclosure, regarding my actions and movements of the last week:
1) My legal name is now Malik Smallwood Min Alkuhul Al'Akthar Almajida (King Smallwood Of Booze Most Exalted).
2) I ate 3 tacos.
3) I took a dump in the "women's" room of the Everett, Washington Transit Center - but only because there was a trans junkie shooting up in the Men's.
4) I saw a doctor for the hundredth time (as is the birthright of all citizens), via the miracle of socialized medicine, in the form of the Oregon Health Plan - which has fixed my broken bones and heart, and taken a tumor out of my brain, and made the very notion of health "insurance" seem as purely evil as it actually is.
5) I ate another taco, and prayed for more undocumented accordion players.
6) I cried for my dear Appalachia, and the ancient mountaintops that have yet to be scraped into rivers of death, in the valleys of the forgotten poor.
7) I watched my country dying, knowing all the while that it will live.
Then I ate some salmon. I think that's it. Homeland Security report complete.