Rudderless Gastronomy


Who am I to judge the most exalted chefs in my city? Honestly, I wouldn't even attempt such a thing. I ain't spent a lifetime in a kitchen, and I ain't got no business offering up opinions about them who have. I'm just a lowly quizmaster.

So if I go to, say, Tasty And Sons, and get served a total disaster on a plate called a "fried green tomato BLT", I oughta recognize that the dish wasn't a trainwreck at all. So many people who know so much more than me have weighed in on such things, so I will just defer to them. I got it. But here are a just a few things this layperson can say for sure:

  1. I have purchased tilapia for 2-3 bucks a pound (whole fish price) at several of Portland's Vietnamese markets. A typical fish weighs just over a pound.
  2. Javier's on Lombard (open 24 hours) will fry me an entire tilapia for $7.50 (face and all), with so, so many delicious things to go with it.
  3. Yesterday at Pok-Pok Noi, I ordered the exact same fish. It was a special. It came to me utterly alone on my plate, bathed in a sauce that was way too sweet.
  4. That fish cost TWENTY-SIX DOLLARS. Sorry I'm so naive about the Portland food revolution. I'm seriously working on it. You yuppie fucks.

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